Lack of community and contentment has been my greatest challenge over the past year. While the pandemic fueled a lot of this, deciding to not renew my SF lease and nomad with a vague plan didn’t help either.
This road can be pretty lonely. Meeting amazing people over and over helps. You do develop rapport deeply and quickly. Yet, you’re constantly saying goodbye, crashing off the high. It’s the price for sharing a piece of life with so many people who are inspiring, highly motivated, and full of energy. Then the moments go by where there are few people to fill the void. Finding moments where your only retreat is what stillness you can find in the mind.
I find myself having to readjust to an inner wold that is much quieter and not as rich with the same energy. There in lives the struggle of every doubt you could throw at yourself. Real growth comes from fighting through these negative moments. Being still with yourself is your greatest challenge. It echos the hardest lessons you’ve been ignoring for so long. While it’s easy to get distracted in this work, adventure begins to solve these kinds of things.
The choices and risks I’m taking to align with my true gifts continue to bring quality people and ideas into my life. My time in Hawaii has proven to be a great educator. Of the many words Hawaii has taught me, one of the most common I hear and see is “Ohana”. Ohana, which means family; tends to carry with it a deeper bond; an extension of community that extends beyond blood.
“Loneliness doesn’t have to be a dark place synonymous with being alone. It should be the place you refresh before returning to the community to deliver the gifts you’ve enriched.”
My ohana has brought me closer to understanding what gifts I have to provide, what I need, and what I deserve from a community. Along the way realizing it still doesn’t have as much to do with anyone as much as it has to do with the way I witness myself.
Things and the importance of said things, tend to get buried in the volume of other desires. Taken for granted is the awareness of what essentials we really need.
Learning that my community is always wherever I am. Loneliness doesn’t have to be a dark place synonymous with being alone. It should be the place you refresh before returning to the community to deliver the gifts you’ve enriched. Regardless if it’s in Hawaii, Colombia, Indonesia, Portugal or any other beautiful place on the earth.
You won’t always be successful at finding the people you need.
But sometimes you get lucky, and the people you need find you.
Perhaps the real lesson is learning to trust yourself.
Trusting you’ll always find those moments.
